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Firstborn Son

Throughout the Bible we read of the importance of being the firstborn son. For in Israel the firstborn son was given twice as much of the inheritance as the rest of the sons. Not so sure how that is gonna hold up here in Connecticut. Not looking so hot in the "inheritance" department lately with this economy.....not to mention.....son #2 and #3 might have a beef with this.
(little sis is likely to throw a tantrum as well if word got out)

This weekend we celebrated Gunner's 18th birthday....yes 18!!! Can you believe that? I cannot. I asked Josh when he got so old to have an 18 year old son.

We were not going to let the 20+ inches of beautiful snow that got dumped our way stop us from celebrating this special day. Gunner bundled up, grabbed the shovel and made a path to the truck. He was determined to pick up his girlfriend so that they could spend the day together. After they made it home safely, we made pizza, baked cookies and stayed in comfy clothes for the majority of the day (church was canceled). Then we shoveled out the truck......again......kicked it into 4 wheel drive and all headed out to the Mall later in the evening. It was just the way Gunner wanted to celebrate, a simple day packed with this favorite things in life....family, food and fun. It was perfect in every way.

In light of recent events, you can imagine that this was another very emotional day for me. I kept it together pretty well and decided to hang onto all the joy I could get my heart and hands on. It just blows my mind to think of how quickly 18 years has flown by.....I can't even wrap my head around it all.

To think.....that May 5, 1991.......the day I found out I was pregnant was the turning point in my life. It was day I stopped thinking about me.....and started thinking about Him. Yes.....Him.....God.

It was then, when I was still so lost......that I made a "deal" with God. A deal that if He gave us a healthy child, I would never touch a drug again. Little did I know that God didn't need me to strike any deals to gain His grace.

It was then, that I started to search. I didn't even know what I was searching for, I just knew that there had to be more in life. Little did I know that God was my Lighthouse, ready to show me the Way...... had I only taken my eyes off of me and looked Up.

It was then, that He gave me the Ultimate gift. A gift that, in the natural......was only the size of a piece of rice....but brought a supernatural amount of love that I have never felt before. It was the love of a becoming a mother. It was the miraculous gift of carrying this life that was given to me.....a precious and ever so perfect gift from Above.


So here he is......in all his goofy glory. I am probably a little bias, but I have to tell you that he is one of the kindest kids you will ever meet. He has struggled with attention/retention issues all his life (unfortunately, he got that from me) but he never gives up. His sense of humor is off the wall (as you can see in this homecoming/senior photo....he is SO not the "thinker" type) His nickname is The Mayor as he is friends with everyone. He will give you (or a stranger) the shirt off his back. He loves sports, is very competitive (something else that he gets from me!)....he loves music.....he loves laughing....and most of all, he loves Jesus.
At the end of our night.....I gave him a big hug and handed him this note. I hope he keeps it tucked away safe and reads it from time to time as he ventures into this new chapter in his life.

Happy Birthday Gunner!

Dear Gunner~

Words cannot express how proud your dad and I are of you. You are now a man…..but will always be my little boy. You have grown into such a beautiful person….on the inside and out.

Your love of Christ makes my heart swell….always continue to follow Him. In fact, I encourage you to chase Him. He will never let you down. When you keep your eyes fixed on Him, everything else will fall into place in your life. Even when the road in life gets bumpy, remember that He is with you always and will never let you go. It is within those rocky times that we learn and grow and come out stronger than before.


I pray that your life is filled with joy, peace and happiness….for these gifts you have constantly shared with us. God gave you the gift of humor….never stop laughing.


We pray that wherever your path leads you……you are happy. Success is not measured by money or materialistic gains. Success follows doing what you want to do. Success means having the courage, the determination, and the will to become the person God wants you to be.

And as you receive your gifts for your birthday…..know that it is I who has gotten the most precious gift of all. I had been given the Ultimate gift from God 18 years ago. The gift of motherhood. For it was because of you that I was brought into a place where my heart was no longer just mine. I didn’t know the full meaning of love until you were placed in my arms. It was an instant “I would die for you” kind of love.

Always know…..that no matter how old you are, how big you are…..I will always be your mom and always will be here for whatever you need.



I love you, Gunner…



xox

Mom


Thank you for allowing me to share my firstborn son with you.....

Peace~
*~Michelle~*

ps. Thank you again for the overwhelming outpouring of prayers that were offered and lifted up our name this past weekend. What a blessing to be surrounded by such an awesome circle of friends who share our love and faith in Jesus. We know and believe He is good.....all.the.time.!

16 comments:

Karen said...

It is really amazing how fast time goes. My baby brother turned 18 a few months ago, and I just can't believe it.

I hope your son had a great birthday. I know he's got a great family!

Tracy said...

I can totally relate to how quickly time goes, how quickly our children become adults. Your son's a handsome young man.

Thanks for sharing your story I appreciated reading about your deal with God when you became pregnant. I adore how you put it that "Little did I know that God didn't need me to strike any deals to gain His grace." Isn't that the truth! Our God is good and I'm ever grateful for His grace.

Michelle said...

That is such a sweet post.

My baby boy is only 8 months old and I can't fathom him becoming a man. I hope we can lead him on the right path so that he too has a passion for Jesus!

Andrea said...

Happy Birthday, Gunner! What an amazing young man you must be.

Michelle,
You are an amazing Mom...thank you for sharing Gunner with us.

Merry Christmas and GOD BLESS,
andrea

Beth E. said...

Happy birthday to Gunner! What a sweet letter you wrote. :-)

Denise said...

Thanks for sharing such a beautiful tribute to your son.

christy rose said...

Oh Michelle!! How sweet!!! What a special tribute to your firstborn son!! What a gift from the Lord! I just can not believe how fast that time goes by. It is like we just blink and it is gone. I love the song by Kenny Chesney, "Don't Blink" I can so relate!

It sounds like Gunner had a memorable 18th birthday! How fun!

Happy Birthday Gunner!!!

Beth in NC said...

He is so handsome. What a blessing that note will be to him someday.

(((hugs)))
Beth

Laura said...

What a beautiful post. I am just now entering the teen years....and I don't know how I got here?? In just a few short years I will have 3 teenage daughters in my home. But I do love this age!! I just love writing "birthday" letters to my girls. And then I put them in their scrapbook.

Thank you for sharing your God story. Isn't He just marvelous?? He IS good and His mercy endures....FOREVER!!!

Have a very Merry Christmas!!

RCUBEs said...

Happy birthday to your son! Days do go by so fast!

That's a beautiful letter you had given him and I pray that he would keep that and always read it at times that he needed to know who truly cares and love him, after God! Merry Christmas and God bless and keep you.

Kendra Lee said...

Happy Birthday, Gunner! Congrats to raising such a fine young man.

Praying for you!

Deborah Ann said...

I love the picture, Gunner's a modern day hippie (a Jesus lovin' hippie). Looks like your freedom in Christ found its way to him. So many parents dictate what their kids wear, what music they listen to, what activities they do, etc. When I look at this picture I see a young man who is full of life, just waiting to embark on his own special journey in Jesus.

Happy Birthday Gunner, and
Merry Christmas Michelle and family!

sarah said...

this is so beautiful. I get it. You're a mama. like me...anything for your a child. Your heart is all over this post. Thank you for sharing. Sarah

Kim said...

What a wonderful gift you gave your son!

You are an amazing mother!

Bill (cycleguy) said...

Just read this post. Sorry to hear about your "Isaac" but also thankful for your willingness to allow the healing of God to flood over you. Prayers said for you just now.

Bill (cycleguy) said...

Forgot: Happy birthday to Gunner. Cool tat.

 

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