.....why butterflies?

So I have been trying to think about what my first "real" entry would be......and my mind went blank.....for once.

I guess I can start by why I am fascinated with butterflies.......as it kinda sums up how I feel about who I am and the amazing grace of God.

So I take a look at the life cycle of a butterfly.....particularly the Swallowtail butterfly. When the Swallowtail is born in the caterpillar stage....it is hideous. It's not even a cute fluffy caterpillar like the wooly bear or even the brilliantly patterned monarch.....no, it looks like a slimy ugly slug. So I guess I relate to my life before Christ as ugly....I wasn't a bad person actually......I believe I was a good person for the most part......but made my share of bad choices, that now looking back......made me ugly. Not necessarily ugly in the natural (hopefully not sounding conceited, lol)......but ugly in the spiritual. I made choices that I am sure where hurtful to God and to others,......and myself. But as God keeps that ugly slug caterpillar safe from hungry birds and frogs and also sheltered from the elements which could easily end his journey early......He protected me and kept me safe during some reckless times.....all without me even knowing it. That is how awesome Our Father is.

The next part of the caterpillar's journey brings him to his chrysalis where he is transformed. I believe that God can bring transformation into your life in many ways......some people are faced with a life changing event (hence the name.....life changing) such as death of a loved one, news of a terminal illness or being spared from death. Others can witness God's love in a positive scenario and feel and embrace the transformation ever so gently.

My transformation came about through an angel here on earth named Lili. We became friends through our husbands who were 80's rock and roll guys. Her husband was in a Christian rock band and my husband, who also was a spandex wearing, AquaNet using rocker.... ran sound for their band when he wasn't on stage himself. There is a special warmth when you are around Lili and we quickly became friends. Her laughter is contagious and she radiates love from within. She doesn't need to wear any t-shirt or piece of jewelry......she walks the walk of Jesus.

So fast forward to her asking Josh and I to be her son Kelub's godparents.....I look back and wonder why she would consider me,......again, I wasn't a bad person....but felt that surely she must have known someone more "godly" to take on the role of a "godparent" in her circle of friends. She must have gotten the memo from God as He didn't see who I "was"........He knew who I could (and was supposed to) "be".

So we went to her church for the ceremony.......and that is where I was drawn to my chrysalis.....I walked into the building, pretty much expecting an event consisting of rituals, kneeling and quiet repentance/prayer.......can you tell how I was raised? Instead......it was a sanctuary of life and love! A contemporary band was playing, people were dancing and singing in the aisles......it was pure joy. I felt a peace come over me......and although I was in a place I have never been before, I felt such a sense of familiarity and comfort..... I know it was God and the angels embracing me and singing "Welcome Home". A whirlwind of emotions came over me......I was smiling and within minutes, I was crying......it was a happy kind of cry......and I really didn't even understand why I was filled with such overwhelming emotion.

So just as the chrysalis stage is a process, so was my transformation into becoming a Christ follower. It wasn't something that just hit me like a bolt of lightening at that church ceremony ......it was more like I yearned to be in that comforting place again. And I found that the more I searched to learn more about God.....the more comfort/peace I was blessed with. The more I dove into searching for Him, the more humbled I felt as I realizes how much He has done already in my life and it was only then, that I gave Him ALL the glory. I gave him all the glory for bring Josh into my life, blessing me with four healthy children, just everything that we sometimes take for granted.

Accepting God fully into your life can bring such joy and happiness....but it also came with the process of change...and change can be very uncomfortable. We, as humans.....are creatures of habit, so change isn't always easy. My ways and my thoughts were not going to be magically converted. No, although God can make it easy to "do the right thing"......it was something that I had to make a conscious effort.....and I do know that at times, it was painful to reflect on my past sins and ask God for forgiveness. I also had to (and still do) ask God for guidance and wisdom every day.

When metamorphosis has taken place, the next step is emerging into it's "new life"........the process can be painful and scary.....but when we witness the awesome life that awaits us.....it is worth all the struggles we must endure. As a butterfly, the ugly caterpillar is born again and has the chance to represent it's Creator, with all His beautiful glory. Just as people marvel at the beauty of a butterfly's wings......we should display God's beauty in our actions and day to day living. I don't think Lili realizes how she represents God's glory with her beauty, inside and out......and I hope I can do the same and bless others. I hope that someday I can help bring others to their own chrysalis/transformation and welcome Christ into their lives.

So, yeah....that not so short story, is how I look at my "new" life as God's child.......He has given me a chance to experience a new life in Him.....and made me beautiful in His image, just like the beautiful wings of a butterfly.

How amazing Our Creator is that He can turn this

...............into this

WOW, this turned into a long story......I guess when I am talking about subjects that I am so passionate about, I lose track of time......so if you are still reading this......thank you for my first therapy session.
Peace and love~
Michelle